~Tainted Love ~
What is Taint?
past tense: tainted; past participle: tainted
1. contaminate or pollute (something)."the air was tainted by fumes from the cars"
3. contaminate, pollute, adulterate, infect, blight, spoil, soil, ruin, destroy;literarybefoul"the wilderness is tainted by pollution"
4. affect with a bad or undesirable quality."his administration was tainted by scandal"
* tarnish, sully, blacken, stain, blot, blemish, stigmatize, mar, corrupt, defile, soil, muddy, damage, harm, hurt ~
How often have we experienced Tainted relationships, tainted Love or even a tainted boss / jobs?
We all have experienced this word, "Taint" one way or another, so how do we overcome and trust again or better yet, break down the guarded wall of fear to allow trust?
I was that person who always gave a second, third and even fourth chance. As I began to open up and trust again, it never failed the trust was tainted.
Developing a hard heart as I watched from afar, it's what I became to know, it was my defense!
I reacted to my feelings, and behaved negative ways to protect myself. I was always ready for the next disappointment with my crystal ball at my side.
I was broken inside, I had fears with huge doubt in trust but I always maintained a smile.
Being a Christian since a young child has always given me a since of security and feelings of God's love within my heart but as I grew older, I put Jesus on a shelf for later because I was busy running my life my way!
God is so patient and loving as He watches us crash and burn. During my crash and burn days, I would hear the Holy Spirit speak to me but I wanted acceptance, friendships and I wanted to be recognized positively or negatively it didn't matter so,
I never listened.
1 John 2:27 But you have received the Holy Spirit, and he lives within you, so you don’t need anyone to teach you what is true. For the Spirit teaches you everything you need to know, and what he teaches is true—it is not a lie. So just as he has taught you, remain in fellowship with Christ. (NLT)
Tragedy close to our family began to open my eyes of Jesus, not the death that occurred within this family but the love of Jesus that surrounded the family that lost their son is truly what caught my attention. Pastors and church friends flooded their home with prayers of peace, love and hope filled the air and as I watched and listened, I knew God was calling me back to Him. Afraid and unsure, this time I listened.
Soon After, I re~dedicated my life to Jesus and was baptized, my eyes were completely opened to God's love for me and my tainted past was the past!
God's love gave me the courage and the strength to overcome fears, hurts and I began to quickly trust again. Eager for the teachings of Christ as well as, gaining the friendship and love of Christ Followers was exciting, unbelievable and true! The love of Jesus shown through His church and God's light had become brighter and brighter as my relationship with Jesus became stronger and stronger. Thank you God for loving me and not giving up on me! ❤
Hebrews 13:5-6 Stay away from the love of money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, “I will never, never fail you nor forsake you.” That is why we can say without any doubt or fear, “The Lord is my Helper, and I am not afraid of anything that mere man can do to me.” (TLB)
Philippians 4:13 ❤
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (NKJV)